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  #1  
Old 01-17-07, 09:32 PM
bufford408's Avatar
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The Watch

A Marine walks into a bar and takes a seat next to a very
attractive woman. He gives her a quick glance then
casually looks at his watch for a moment.
The woman notices this and asks, "Is your date running
late?"
"No," he replies, "I just got this state-of-the-art
watch, and I was just testing it."

The intrigued woman says, "A state-of-the-art watch?
What's so special about it?"
The Marine explains, "It uses alpha waves to talk to me
telepathically."
The lady says, "What's it telling you now?"
"Well, it says you're not wearing any panties...."
"The woman giggles and replies, "Well it must be broken
because I am wearing panties!"

The Marine smirks, taps his watch and says, "Damn thing's
an hour fast."
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  #2  
Old 01-17-07, 09:36 PM
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That was good!
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  #3  
Old 01-17-07, 11:26 PM
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Is that one of your pick-up lines?
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  #4  
Old 01-17-07, 11:34 PM
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Yeah... "Pickup lines most likely to get you slapped in a bar"

It may play different in Arkansas, though.
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  #5  
Old 01-18-07, 01:12 AM
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Ha ha!
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http://img455.imageshack.us/img455/1369/rosekdrosetransp9fk2eb.gif

A Smile

A smile cost nothing, but gives so much.

It enriches those who receive it,
without making poorer those who give.
It takes but a moment, but the memory
of it sometimes lasts forever.

None is so rich or mighty that he
can get along without it,
and none is so poor but that
he can be made rich by it.

A smile creates happiness in the home,
fosters goodwill in business,
and is the countersign of friendship.

It brings rest to the weary,
cheer to the discouraged, sunshine to the sad,
and it is nature's best antidote for trouble.

Yet it cannot be bought, begged, borrowed,
or stolen, for it is something that is of no
value to anyone until it is given away.

Some people are too tired to give you a smile.
Give them one of yours, as none needs a smile
so much as he who has no more to give.

- author unknown
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  #6  
Old 01-18-07, 04:56 AM
BEB BEB is offline
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Nice one, Bufford!

Quote:
Originally Posted by TXCharlie View Post
Yeah... "Pickup lines most likely to get you slapped in a bar"
Never know until you try! I'll report back...
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