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The Fastest Thing
Four men applied for the same job and were equally qualified, so the interviewer decided to ask them one more question to show their creativity: "What is the fastest thing you can think of and why?"
The first man answered, "A thought, because it just pops into your head without warning."
"Good," replied the interviewer. "And you?"
The second man said, "A blink, because it comes and goes and you don't know it happened."
"Good," said the interviewer. He turned to the third man.
"Light, because when you flip a switch, the light comes on instantaneously."
"Good," said the interviewer. "Science says nothing is faster than light."
Then it was Joe's turn. "The fastest thing is diarrhoea," he said.
"What?!" spurted the stunned interviewer.
Joe explained, "Look, the other day when I wasn't feeling so good, I ran for the bathroom, but before I could think, blink, or turn on the light, I had already pooped my pants!"
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500 fights, that's the number I figured when I was a kid. 500 street fights and you could consider yourself a legitimate tough guy. You need them for experience. To develop leather skin. So I got started. Of course along the way you stop thinking about being tough and all that. It stops being the point. You get past the silliness of it all. But then, after, you realize that's what you are.
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HAHAHAHAAHA
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